How to take a REAL selfie

Listen up kids.  You don’t know the first damn thing about taking a selfie.  See first you take your fully manual Nikon and focus it on your hand outstretched in front of you, but bent up at the wrist.  See where I’m going with this?  Then you take a meter reading of the area where you will take your selfie and set the exposure.  Then,  you put the camera in your left hand, that’s right, only in your left hand, since that’s where the shutter button is, and frame your photograph.  You can do this because you know the focal length of the lens and approximately how wide the frame will be at arms length.  Then you take your selfie.   Those ugly black bars on the left and right are the film edge that I left in the scan so that the “right people” will know that I did this “in camera.”  I’ll leave the rest about going to the lab to get the film processed, sleeving the negative and then going to the darkroom to make a print, to your vivid imagination.  Oh yea, those little white spots you see?  That’s called dust.  We used to have that back in the 80’s.


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